The facility called us to say our daughter, Shelley,
was transitioning. They couldn’t say when the final goodbye would come, but
they thought it would be a few hours or days. I remember standing in the
kitchen as my husband and I cried on each other’s shoulders.
Family went
immediately to see her.
She rallied and stayed with us until October, 26,
2024.
Since her homegoing to heaven, I suffer from the loss.
Not only do I miss her, but I’m a woman without purpose. I spent the past ten
years caring for her. I woke up thinking about what I needed to do for her, and
then I went to bed thinking about what I needed to do the following day.
In years past, I wrote Christian novels, and many of
them are still available on Internet sites. Gay's Books But while she was ill, and since
she left, I’m in a writer’s slump. If I were inspired to begin a new book, I
might acquire a dedication again, but right now, I’m floundering. I need a new
role.
As I search for usefulness, I thought of this blog and
decided to write on the subject. Perhaps I can help another caregiver who faces
the same problem. When a loved one leaves, it takes time to rediscover ourselves.
Caregivers spend hours thinking and planning. We devote
most of our time and money to helping a loved one, and for the most part, we are
happy with the privilege of assisting the family member we adore.
But when we are released from that responsibility, we
can feel lost. What to do? I don’t want a similar task. Ten years was
enough.
I love teaching Scripture. God gave me the gift to do
this, and it gives me a sense of purpose, but I’m limited even there. People
aren’t knocking down my door begging me to teach Bible to them.
If you are a caregiver whose job is finished, how are
you filling the gap?