Tuesday, March 7, 2023

Sweet Memories


 IPhones are amazing. They produce videos all by themselves.  The above one popped up recently, and I thought I'd share it.  The video has pictures from 2018/2019. Shelley went through a lot of hairstyles back in those days.

The last style is a pixie. None of us liked that one, but her hair grows quickly. She is a natural brunette, but she decided she wanted to be blonde, and she liked that color.

When she lived in  the assisted living in Columbus Oaks, Columbus, TX, I took her way out in the country to Rudy's.  Rudy had a mobil home turned into a hair salon, and he was good with hair, and he was excellent with Shelley and her dementia.

Before Covid, I ask Rudy to cut in short in a style Shelley had worn once.  It was sort of a mullet back then. I showed him pictures. He must have been having an off day because Shelley ended up with a pixie.

Shelley loved wearing makeup and jewelry.  I remember how shocked I was the day I went to the assisted living in Columbus, and she wasn't dressed yet. I put the makeup out for her. She looked at it, and then turned those big eyes up to me and said, "I don't remember how." The day before, she had remembered and had applied it flawlessly, but from that day on, someone had to apply makeup to her little face.

Dementia is strange. It's common for a person suffering with it to instantly have a skill vanish. What they do today, can't be done tomorrow.

Yesterday was her birthday, and we took cakes and presents. She wasn't aware of much of what we were doing, but as we began to gather up items, she said, "Are y'all leaving?"

That's the first sentence she has generated in months. She responds appropriately, but when she talks, it is gibberish.


March 6, 2023, Shelley with sister, Christy

Taking pictures is difficult these days. Shelley is bent over and can't hold her head up.  If you say, "smile," she doesn't seem to understand. She only smiles if she sees me.

The staff had her dressed in a pretty dress. I had bought it for her several years ago to wear at Easter. They tied her long hair into a pony tail. No makeup, though. It's is difficult to apply cosmetics. Like a child, Shelley wants to eat whatever is brought close to her face.

She was diagnosed in 2014, so we are into our 9th year.  Most studies say early onset dementia patients live about 8 years.  I found myself wondering if this would be her last birthday.

I did well yesterday. I didn't burst into tears during the day. Sister, Christy, and her dad did well too. I know it was because people prayed for us.

One of the kindest things you can do for a caregiver is pray for them.