I Went Back

 

Yesterday, November 20, 2025, I went back to Shelley’s residence, the last one she stayed in before moving her spirit to heaven.  She transcended to her eternal home on October 26, 2024.

How did I feel as I entered the familiar place?

Not as melancholy as I expected. You see, I always thought if I could make it through the first year’s anniversary, I’d be okay. 

I pulled into a parking place I had used many times before and felt okay. Sure, I said a quick prayer, but I didn’t feel the urge to cry.

I was there to play the piano. I had offered to play many times in the past while Shelley was a resident, but my husband never wanted me to do so. Why, you ask? I have no idea. I’m no expert pianist, but I can play hymns in an adequate fashion, and we had donated hymn books to the facility.

Anyway, without telling him, I decided to go back and play for the residents. I can’t do much, but I can do that.

They had rearranged furnishings, but otherwise, it appeared the same. At least with furniture. The personnel have changed many times over. I often wonder why that is.  Working with dementia patients is a difficult job. Perhaps that’s the reason why.

The activity director had positioned the patients in a gathering behind the piano. I like to see the audience, but with the piano placed that way, I couldn’t, but I heard some of them sing!

One lady sat in a wheelchair right behind me. I played old, familiar hymns, and she sang the words, and she hit all the high notes. She impressed me big time. She had a gorgeous voice. A choir master would have been overjoyed to have her in the choir.

Others sang too.  I’ve always said music is the last to leave the mind.

Before Shelley moved to memory care, she lived in an assisted living facility.  Retired guys brought karaoke machines. They sang, and they danced with the residents. The ladies loved the attention.

I will play there again. I received more blessings than I gave.

Where Shelley was

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Tips for Caregivers

1.    Take music with you.

2.    Sing with them, even if you can’t carry a tune.

3.    If you play, do so for the residents.

4.    Even if you don’t know anyone in a facility, you can offer music to them.

5.    Offer to dance with them.