My Friend Visits Shelley

 

Shelley's Memory Care Facility

Someone once reminded me that I spend so much time taking care of Shelley’s needs that I neglect my other daughters.

This is true, to an extent. One daughter lives nearby, and I see her often. The other daughter lives in Kentucky, so the distance creates a problem. She can’t come here on a regular basis, and I can’t go there much.

I changed that a few weeks ago.

I invited myself to her house for Mother’s Day. She accepted my invitation to come, and I flew to Kentucky. We had a marvelous time. I’m writing about that trip on another blog.  You will find it here.  Gay N. Lewis

My friend, Dee, checked on Shelley while I was away. In fact, she went twice to see Shelley and sent me pictures. 

She told me Shelley’s hair was combed and her clothes matched. This is important to me. She also made sure Shelley ate her lunch. There are times when the aides who feed her grow tired of the job. Supplying food to someone with dementia takes time and patience.

On another day, Dee noticed Shelley was cold and asked for a blanket.

This friend really blessed me by going to see Shelley while I was away. She drove thirty minutes each way to do this. A sacrifice on her part, but I felt at ease knowing Dee would voice an issue for my daughter if one arose.

Of course, my husband went to see Shelley too, but men don’t always see needs. And hubby doesn’t wish to complain about a situation for fear he will make it worse. Dee used diplomacy to bring needs to an aides attention.

I'm thankful for Dee. She is a Good Samaritan. She helps me more than she knows.

~~~

Hints to Help a Caregiver.

1.    1. Offer to go by a facility and give the caregiver a break.

2.    2.  If something seems out of place, point it out. The employees will keep the facility in shape if more people stop by and notice things.

3.    3  Ask questions. They can be a way of expressing diplomacy. For instance, “Is it normal for her not to eat that applesauce?”  "She is cold, is it okay if I get a blanket?"